Author Topic: ~ Funny Quotes ~ (Read 16726 times)

MysteRy · « **Reply #90 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:26:45 PM »

[highlight-text]Advertising is the most fun you can have with your clothes on.

Jerry Delia Femina

MysteRy · « **Reply #91 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:27:15 PM »

[highlight-text]Man was made at the end of the week's work when God was tired.

Mark Twain

MysteRy · « **Reply #92 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:27:49 PM »

[highlight-text]Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.

P. J. O'Rourke

MysteRy · « **Reply #93 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:28:17 PM »

[highlight-text]I have a vest. If I had my arms cut off, it would be a jacket.

Mitch Hedberg

MysteRy · « **Reply #94 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:28:47 PM »

[highlight-text]There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker.

Charles M. Schulz

MysteRy · « **Reply #95 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:29:32 PM »

[highlight-text]By trying we can easily endure adversity. Another man's I mean.

Mark Twain

MysteRy · « **Reply #96 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:30:24 PM »

[highlight-text]There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.

Henry Kissinger

MysteRy · « **Reply #97 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:30:54 PM »

[highlight-text]I was sleeping the other night alone thanks to the exterminator.

Emo Philips

MysteRy · « **Reply #98 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:31:20 PM »

[highlight-text]I'm an idealist. I don't know where I'm going but I'm on my way.

Carl Sandburg

MysteRy · « **Reply #99 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:31:50 PM »

[highlight-text]It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes.

Jay London

MysteRy · « **Reply #100 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:32:17 PM »

[highlight-text]Parents are the last people on earth who ought to have children.

Samuel Butler

MysteRy · « **Reply #101 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:32:43 PM »

[highlight-text]What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?

George Carlin

MysteRy · « **Reply #102 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:33:15 PM »

[highlight-text]Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus or just a really cool opotamus?

Mitch Hedberg

MysteRy · « **Reply #103 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:33:43 PM »

[highlight-text]A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

Michel de Montaigne

MysteRy · « **Reply #104 on:** June 03, 2018, 01:34:06 PM »

[highlight-text]My computer beat me at checkers but I sure beat it at kickboxing.

Emo Philips

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